Friday, January 30, 2026

Lay Down Your Soul to the Gods Rock 'n' Roll: Dark Regards by Dave Hill and Artyom Topilin

 Dark Regards 

by Dave Hill and Artyom Topilin

Dark Regards book cover

Comedian and author Dave Hill
Cover art by Artyom Topilin

Many thanks to Oni Press and NetGalley for keeping it metal with Dave Hill’s hilarious and absurd Black Metal odyssey Dark Regards. I wasn’t exactly sure what I was getting into with these 4 issues that are now combined into one volume, but when I read the description about how a stand-up comedian’s attempts to promote his fictious black metal band Witch Taint by disparaging Norwegian black metal bands, I knew I had to check this out. I was glad to see that Lords of Chaos also serves as a reference point for this book, and that author Hill was able to find the humor in the book. When I first read Lords of Chaos, I couldn’t finish it. It was so bleak and dark, but I’m glad that I returned to it a few years later and was able to read through the cannibalism and Thanatos to find the humor in how extreme these Norwegians wanted to be. Ultimately, their pursuit of Mayhem (pun intended) led to violence, murder, and church burnings as a way to prove their metal/mettle. Hill focuses more on some of the absurdities of these Scandinavian scallywags like the desire to use torches for lighting in a record store. However, Hill also maintains the threats and extremes that these bands are willing to go to in order to be the bleakest, darkest, harshest sounding band around. Plus, he creates some killer band names like Rectal Heresy, Devil’s Snot, and Odin’s Pile.

The story is a little slow to start, but once Dave is turned on to Nachthammer, Viking Colon, and Misery Buffet (more realistic sounding bands) by uber-cool record store worker Tierny, he’s visited y Lord Abscess, one of the singers who died from self-cannibalism. Again, this sounds almost like something you’d read in Lords of Chaos. Just like Dave, I sometimes can go to extremes when I hear a new genre of music, especially music that’s hard and heavy. However, Dave goes even more extreme, developing a fake band and trolling real Norwegian black metal bands, which eventually brings them to the US to hunt him down. Dave eventually gathers a group of metal maniacs to form the band Witch Taint. However, with the arrival of the Nordic Warriors, Dave and Witch Taint will have to battle these true black metalheads to prove whether they are extremely extreme. This was a really fun story to read, with lots of great references to metal, not just Norwegian black metal. Also, the artwork by Artyom Topilin was great. It’s extremely colorful, and yet the artistry really captures some of the darker elements of metal. I loved the way the Norwegians are portrayed as big and hulking. Dave’s corpse paint is also well done. Sometimes with these kinds of absurd stories the art might be overdone or too comedic, but I found a nice balance between humor and horror that helps to capture these complementary tones of the story. I especially loved the alternate covers in the back of the volume that reference classic metal albums from the likes of Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, and Dio. This was just a fun read, although I wish there was more of Lord Abscess. Hopefully there are more stories in the works about this character. Dark Regards is a fun and wild ride. Highly Recommended!


Judas Priest cover by Brian Level
Killer Eddie Cover by Brian Level
Dio Cover by Brian Level












No comments:

Post a Comment