The Ego Trip: Psychedelic Toads, a Trail of Deaths, and the Guru Who Peddled Transcendence by Kimon de Greef
Many thanks to Doubleday Books and NetGalley for sharing an
advanced copy of Kimon de Greef’s wild and mind expanding book The Ego Trip: Psychedelic Toads, a Trail of Deaths, and the Guru Who Peddled Transcendence.
Following in similar investigative books that explore the recent explosion in
psychedelic therapy and tourism, de Greef takes readers down a less traveled
path to enlightenment and psychedelic knowledge through the Sonoran Desert
Toads, also known as Incilius Alvarius or previously known as Budo Alvarius, a
species of toad that exudes a toxin that has psychedelic properties that are
similar to those found in plants like ayahuasca. De Greef’s book not only takes
readers on a trip to learn more about the history and misrepresentation of
smoking toads (or sometimes licking them), but also about the self-appointed
toad gurus who have swept in to the Sonoran Desert area and received the
“blessings” of the Seri people, the supposed indigenous guardians of the toad
medicine. Much like Ernesto LondoƱo’s Trippy: The Peril and Promise of
Medicinal Psychedelics and John O’Connor’s A Short, Strange Trip, de
Greef’s book not only examines the promises of enlightenment and new insights
to be gained from these psychedelic substances found in nature, but also
examines the psychedelic gurus and facilitators who lead these new therapeutic
sessions, and the implications and consequences of taking plant medicine and
traditions to those with psychological problems and mental illness. It leaves
readers to question whether these individuals are really helping or exploiting
others and their needs. De Greef’s reporting leaves us uncertain as to an exact
answer, but it is clear that there are power and economic inequalities that
still persist as a result of the recent book in psychedelic tourism and the
emerging industry that supports it. Furthermore, I found de Greef’s questions
and analyses important in examining the ways in which some of these
facilitators take advantage of the increasing desire for personal insight,
growth and knowledge, and how psychedelic substances have largely filled a void
for these psychonauts.
At the center of this tale of toads is a charismatic but troubling
physician named Octavio Rettig, whose own struggles with substance abuse were relieved
through toad medicine. De Greef’s narrative is divided into two parts, with the
first part exploring Octavio’s addiction battle and eventual rise to become a
trusted purveyor of toad medicine to others who are sick and suffering with the
approval of the Seri, a nomadic desert people who occupy land in and around the
Sonoran Desert. I found this part of the book to be fascinating not only
because of Octavio’s unique rise to psychedelic supremacy, but also because de
Greef details the long, strange trip of 5-MeO DMT, the supposed God Molecule,
that is found in not only toad venom, but also in plants and the molecule’s
synthesis in labs. Unlike other long-lasting psychedelics, 5-MeO DMT is a much
shorter trip with users experiencing an intense ego dissolution, often viewed
as providing new insights and connections. In some of the latter half of the
book, which details the attempts of pharmaceutical companies to patent and
produce 5-MeO DMT for therapeutic purposes, researchers liken its powerful
experiences and effects on the brain as a kind of system reset that possibly can
be a powerful agent in helping individuals with significant depressive
symptoms, especially those with treatment resistant depression. We not only
learn more about the history of this intense psychedelic, but also about the
Seri people, who were the supposed guardians of toad medicine and whose council
granted Octavio special rights as a kind of shaman who can distribute toad
medicine. De Greef’s research also takes us into the history of toad smoking
and licking, which explores some of the misconceptions and fear mongering about
the attempts to seek out this new, psychedelic experience, as well as some of
the cultural and anthropological studies related to psychedelics and toad
medicine. This was among some of the most interesting aspects of the book, and de
Greef’s clear summary and analysis of the history and concepts helps readers
understand the possibility and questions around the use of toad venom in
ancient or pre-Columbian spiritual experiences from people like the Mayans and Olmecs.
De Greef consults with well-known experts in the field like Andrew Weil and Wade
Davis, as well as other well-known researchers whose work in Central and South
America helped establish much of the scientific study of plant medicines of
indigenous people. What is most fascinating, though, is through de Greef’s
examination of the Seri people is that we find that there is not much evidence
to support their use of toad venom in any kind of spiritual or religious
experiences. The Seri people, who have inhabited the Sonoran Desert area for
centuries, revered many other animals in their traditional ways, but there is
no evidence that the toad was one of them. De Greef’s reporting indicates that
Octavio likely brought toad medicine to the Seri people in order to help with
the high rates of alcohol and drug addiction and used their traditional songs and
imagery in his toad ceremonies, providing a kind of credibility to the idea
that toad medicine is an ancient, indigenous practice. In fact, Octavio
received letters from the tribal council indicating his skills as a practitioner
of toad medicine, a credential he would use to travel the world and facilitate
toad ceremonies for others who were interested in or in need of some kind of
mystical experience to bring about change.
In the first half of the book, de Greef also details the
complications that have arisen in trying to extract the toad venom, since it
requires “milking” the toads by squeezing them. The toads are nocturnal and
only come out during the rainy season, spending much of the year underground in
the Sonoran Desert. Further complicating the issue is the fact that the Sonoran
Desert has become an area used by cartels and coyotes to facilitate border
crossings, and toad hunters have, at times, been abducted or experienced
conflicts with both groups, making toad medicine a difficult and sometimes
dangerous substance to obtain. As Octavio’s prominence rises in the world of
toad medicine, de Greef describes how his ceremonies gradually take on a kind
of rote-like practice, where he sometimes tries to take on as many customers as
possible, many times ignoring or failing to watch over individuals in the
throes of an intense, psychedelic experience. Furthermore, he incorporates
other plant medicines in the process, which may have other effects on his participants.
What was even more troubling was that as a physician, he seemed to do no intake
or prior history to understand any possible physical or mental conditions that
may impact the treatment. In fact, Octavio and some of the other practitioners
seem to view toad medicine as a kind of panacea that can treat all conditions
from addiction to diabetes and ADHD. As readers will learn, this cavalier
approach to a powerful psychedelic has dangerous and tragic consequences.
The second half of the book was also interesting, but I
enjoyed it less than the first half. While Octavio is still featured in the
second half of the book, this section moves away from the Sonoran Desert and
into the business world, where we learn more about the attempts of start-up
pharmaceutical companies to bank on the growing trend of psychedelic therapies,
and how new attempts to synthesize 5-MeO DMT has led to an increase in trials
for this medicine. Among the strands in this story is the growing attempts to
legitimize psychedelic medicine, and how the psychedelic toad community struggles
with reigning in Octavio’s messianic behavior, which has resulted in injuries
and deaths. It is interesting to learn more about how some of the
pharmaceutical companies have attempted to take 5-MeO DMT to trials and to read
about the outcomes of these experimental trials, but I found this aspect of the
story a little more clinical and not as exciting as the first half of the story,
where de Greef examines the history, rituals, and cult of toad medicine. In
some ways, there are parallels between Octavio and these companies, who seemingly
both seek to exploit the growing interest in psychedelic therapies and their
role in self-exploration and actualization. As de Greef’s reporting and
analysis demonstrate, there seems to be a fine line between the beneficial and
the profitable approaches of both facilitator and companies. That is, while
they both seem to want to improve outcomes and contribute to wellness of
individuals, there’s also a need to make money, and when readers look beyond
the visions and trails, we’re left wondering who benefits the most from toad
medicine.
The Ego Trip is a fascinating book that incorporates
scientific and true-crime reporting to explore the complications arising not
only from a controversial and misunderstood approach to mental health and wellness,
but also the rise of a complicated, guru-like man who has twisted traditional
ways to create his own narrative and practices for toad medicine. De Greef’s
reporting not only provides more insight into this misunderstood practice, but
also provides readers with more clarity about the origins of toad medicine, and
how practitioners like Octavio Rettig have twisted ambiguities and uncertainties
about indigenous practices to carve out a new age practice that meets the needs
of a growing crowd of psychonauts. De Greef presents compelling evidence to
allow readers to draw conclusions about these practices as well as the kind of
cult that Octavio has built over the past 15 years. It’s a fascinating look at
this obscure, but growing community. Highly recommended!














